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Reflections

 

Reflecting on my journey in Perth, I’ve made a short list of the major learnings I’ve experienced

 

  1. You have choice – every minute of every day. You just may not see it.

  2. Life isn’t always easy. Accept that and put the necessary support structures into your life.

  3. Ask for help. It’s always there, somewhere.

  4. You don’t need to be right all the time. What would you learn if you were?

  5. Quality people make all the difference. Make the effort to discover the quality.

  6. Failure is as important, if not more so at times, than success.

  7. Know when to call it quits: on a project, a friendship or a relationship.

  8. Work through your issues. Get out of your own way. Life then becomes an exciting adventure.

  9. Really experiencing and partaking in your life is a great equaliser – no one is better or worse. We’re mostly all muddling through the best we can.

  10. Do the stupid things you’re yearning to. If not now, then when?

  11. You take yourself with you wherever you go. You may as well get to know you – and like you.

  12. If you don’t try, you’ll never know.

  13. Change is inevitable; Permanence is mostly an illusion.

  14. Trust yourself. You are okay – there is no greater freedom than understanding this.

  15. Love and compassion – these are all that really matter.

New Year, New Ideas

 

Imagine if you thought the same way, with the same thoughts and did the same things for the rest of your life? What would you learn? How would you grow? How would you become certain of who you are and therefore able to handle what life brings before you?

For the first time in many, many years I entered the New Year with no goals, targets or predefined plans. I had a feeling that these wouldn’t work for me at this juncture in my life. – Yes… what kind of life coach am I?

It’s challenging not having my projects listed, goals defined and a direction planned because that’s my norm. My personal life has a number of variables ‘up in the air’ at the moment with many dependent on each other, that I have no choice but to go this different route for 2013 – and plan as I go. This helps me to be fully present to each day and whoever/whatever is in that day. I’m looking at living my year from 100% value-based as opposed to goal driven.

2013 will be a year of being, and not doing – yet without a doubt will include lots of achievements. I’m rolling with the punches and flowing with the many changes. A rigid way of thinking or planning would hinder this process.

The great thing about being the ultimate creator and designer of your life is that you CAN shake things up when you choose. Why not try something different this year? If you’re a spontaneous person, why not add some structure? If you’re a planner and organiser, try letting go a little – you’ll be surprised at the results that change can bring to and within you.

Good luck – and above all, enjoy.

My Personal Message for 2013

 

People always warn that the first 3 months with a newborn are hard – and that’s true to an extent, but I have found the second 3 months to be more of a challenge.

The first 3 months I went through the motions in a bit of a blur of infatuation, adrenaline, novelty and lots of visitors. Eric was easily manageable, portable, light to carry and asleep most of the time. Now that he’s getting bigger with a bit of personality and more diverse needs, things have changed dramatically!

 

So, how does this compare to new projects, relationships or adventures we undertake?

Exactly the same happens in a new relationship. After losing yourself in the first blush of romance, space develops as you realise there are in fact two (sometimes very different) individuals at play here. How do you still create a happy relationship?

Yes, beginnings are usually exciting. A new idea to start a business means you’re very busy preparing, sharing with everyone and starting up. It’s a whirlwind. But then the initial adrenaline wears off and the reality of cashflow, tax returns, networking, a competitive edge kick in and you really start to find your feet.

 

It is in these more challenging three months of parenthood that I’ve truly started to discover who I am as a mother. I can’t follow any one prescribed theory or outlook – the individual I have for a child won’t allow it. He’s unique as am I – and as is our relationship. It’s a lifelong journey to continue to rediscover and redefine this – in our own loving, yet unique way. What a joy this promises to be. And that’s what turns life from the mundane and prescribed into something exciting and evolutionary.

 

Consider these things as you plan your journey or adventure for 2013. You may be starting something or already facing the first challenges in a project or relationship you undertook. Remember to create your own way and be prepared to continue to discover who you are and who you want to become. Each step appears just as it is needed. Embrace your uniqueness – as well as your unique experience and create a 2013 that you’ll reflect on with overwhelming joy.

If You're Happy And You Know It ...

 

I spoke with a thirteen year old boy a couple of weeks ago who made me think! He is a committed and dedicated student, artist and athlete. His main goal is to be successful. His words were that he’d be happy one day when he was successful, and when I asked him how he’d know he was successful, he answered: ‘Someone will tell me.’

I was forced to wonder how far down the generation tree this drive for happiness, dressed up as success goes. Wouldn’t it be nice for youngsters (and us) to just be happy?

 

But why – you ask? What makes happiness important? And why be happy now?

  • It’s infectious

  • It needs no reason

  • It motivates you to keep going

  • It’s inspirational

  • It promotes creativity

  • It’s rewarding

  • It’s self-propagating

  • It’s sustainable

  • It promotes resiliency

  • It's fun

  • And the best.. It’s immediate, if chosen

 

Roger Whittaker in his song 'New World in The Morning' sings of tomorrow never arriving, if you keep holding out for what it may or may not deliver. "I met a man who had a dream he had since he was twenty. I met that man when he was eighty-one. He said too many people just stand and wait up til the mornin', Don't they know tomorrow never comes. "

 

Remember that you can choose what you focus on – and that there are nine areas of your life which can increase your happiness:

  1. Relationships

  2. Social & Hobbies

  3. Mental stimulation

  4. Financial

  5. Career/Job

  6. Community/Charity

  7. Spirituality

  8. Diet, beauty and vitality

  9. Exercise

 

Which areas in your life work for you? What areas provide you happiness? Do you really need to be successful in all of them to be happy? Do you really need to have achieved something in all of them to be happy? Are you perhaps focusing on one area that appears lacking and missing the abundance in the others?

This approach is one of a silver Olympic medallist being miserable for four years until the next attempt to perhaps achieve gold. This could potentially be four lost years.

 

Wouldn't things just feel easier if your happiness was non-conditional?  Why is it only love that has that special requirement?

Roger Whittaker continues: "Everybody talks about a new world in the morning. New world in the morning takes so long."

 

Wouldn't it be the worst thing in the world if you refused happiness today because you were waiting for something else to show up? What a waste.

​© 2013 by Completely Human.

  All rights reserved.

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